My Fitness Journey: The During, Part 1

Here is where it starts to get good.. lol 

So I start Herbalife with a 3 day trial and instantly love it. I decide to order more and with in a month I am converting over into being an Herbalife Independent Distributor/coach. If I recall, it was August of 2014 when I started this journey with Herbalife. In September I hired a Personal trainer to kick things up a notch and get me more comfortable in the gym. I continued to run and started lifting weights and the changes not only in my body but my mind were just insane. I felt so good, so strong, so clear headed.. I was obsessed with the gym. Although I was still doing Herbalife, I was also still going out A LOT and drinking, so I did see results but not the ones that I would have liked to see. 

(Photos range from 2013-2018)

Eventually I decided to really put my focus on my health and this journey. I still went out with friends once in a while but the drinking stopped, I focused more on my business, my health and my happiness. Being apart of the Herbalife community really helped me change my mindset and live a more positive lifestyle. I shared my journey and I wanted to help people feel as good as I felt, not only with Herbalife but in the gym as well. I decided that I wanted to be a Personal Trainer.(currently still studying to get certified) Although I am not where I want to be with it quite yet, I know that I am doing my best to get to that point. 

I have spent the last 5 years in the gym lifting, taking spin classes, running outside in nature. Anything to keep that positive mindset. Through out the 5 years, I have moved away from friends and family, had to adjust to a new city, new jobs, new friends and I fell in love. All super exciting things, but adjusting to all new things can take time and was a little harder for me than I thought it would be. I am grateful for all the tough times, because I grew through them and they made me who I am today and I will continue to learn and grow every single day so I can be the best version of me possible. I am also grateful for all the people I have met along the way and through out my journey so far. I know I have a long ways to go still but I am not stopping, I am going to keep going, I am going to fall back in love with myself and I am going to be happy, successful and proud of myself. 

Stay Tuned for part 2 of this post... 

xo-Ash 

My Fitness Journey: The Before

Growing up I was always bigger than the other girls, it did bother me and I always thought, "If I lose weight or get skinny, Ill be happier, people will think I'm pretty or want to date me." I envied the skinny girls a little, but never did anything to change my way of how I thought about my body or even attempt to be healthy. I played softball for 7 years and was active but ate horribly. 

Once I went to college, it got worse. You start eating out, drinking, your habits and lifestyle changes quite drastically and I think I just ate to comfort myself. I definitely was living my best life and not caring what I ate, how much sleep I got or how much alcohol I was drinking on a daily basis whatsoever. I was happy and smiling on the outside, but on the inside was a whole other story(What Makes you Happy?) 

You can read about all of that in that post there.

 I knew comparing myself to anyone other than myself was not healthy and was not going to get me the body or the happiness I wanted in life but I just continued to focus on the negative or push it all away so I wouldn't have to deal with it. 

(Photos range from 2007-2013) Scroll down for more... 

 

Fast Forward to 2014!

 This is when I figured out that if I run, it clears my head and makes me feel so much better-Hellllooo Endorphins! 

I still did not really understand the concept of a healthy lifestyle. I ran, but still ate awful, still drank way more than I should have plus a ton of stress on top of it all. 

I still felt there was something missing but I continued to run and eat a healthy meal here and there when I decided to. 

I moved to Rhode Island at the end of the summer in 2014 and being away from my family was hard. I had friends who I stayed close with and went out with all the time, so the drinking continued and I would drive to Maine to see my family and my niece. 

I had an old co-worker friend reaching out every once in a while to get me to get Herbalife, and I said no a thousand times and then one day the word "YES" Ill try it just came right out of my mouth before I could even think about it. I had finally signed up for a gym membership but still had no clue what I was doing. I so desperately wanted to change and be healthy and my friend reaching out was just the thing I needed, I just didn't know it yet...

Stay tuned for a continuation of my journey later this week! 

xo Ash

What makes you happy?

I've been asking myself this question a lot lately. 

Do you know what makes you happy? 

Do you make yourself happy? 

Do you put your happiness in others hands? 

My whole life I can remember telling myself, once this happens you'll be happy, once I lose this weight, Ill be happy, and so on and so on. That never happened. So I started to put my happiness in other peoples hands. The more I saw my friends or saw my family I would be so happy, but when I was alone, there was no happiness there. I was constantly waiting for the next "happiness fix" from anyone but myself. Don't get me wrong, I had moments of happiness with myself but it rarely lasted long. 

I cant pinpoint the exact day or time I started to fall in love with myself or my life but I know that it was one of the best feelings I had ever felt. I started to take care of myself way more, going to the gym and eating better. Surrounding myself with more positive influences and focusing on the good moments in life vs the negative. 

Change is good, it can be difficult at times, but in the long run its what makes you grow into a better version of yourself and into the next chapter of your life. I am currently in the process of refocusing myself on what makes ME happy and what I love to do and what I love about myself. Staying positive on a daily basis can be tough but you have to be grateful for the things you have in life and the people who are apart of your life and your journey. I understand that it will take time for me to get back to that place of peace within myself, but I also know that it will be so worth it. 

Things I have been or will be doing to reach my happiness:
-write my daily affirmations
-Write what I am grateful for
-grow and laugh more with my BF
- blog more about this journey 
-live a healthy, active lifestyle 
-plan trips with my girlfriends
-visit my family as much as I can
-Spend less $ on things and more on experiences
-be fearless- whats the worst that could happen, it doesn't work out, I fail? SO WHAT!! Its a learning experience and I know it will help me grow in the right direction!

Thanks for reading, I hope this post helps someone out there trying to find your own love and happiness!

more to come soon!

xo-Ash 

4 months later...

I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you; but instead I am deeply honored knowing you spent the rest of your life with me<3

Its been 4 months since I lost a huge part of my life. 

If you follow me on any SM, you'll know that in February Shmelf passed away. It was one of the worst calls I took from my mom ever. I know it was his time and I am glad he did not suffer, but I miss him more than I could ever explain. My heart aches so much and I always wonder if this pain will go away. I miss sleeping next to him, his purring, the way he always knew when I needed him to be near me, the fact that he had to smell everything I was eating. 

I realize that this post has nothing to do with fashion or fitness, but if you really want to get to know me or you already do know me, you know that this was a huge loss in my life and no pet will ever replace Shmelf. I eventually will get another pet, most likely it will be a dog but for right now, I will continue to process all of this and let myself grieve as much as I need to..

I will be back to revamp and post more soon! 

stay tuned!

xo-A

West Coast Love

My 31st Birthday Trip to the West Coast 

LA & the Palms(My absolute favorite thing in the world)

 

LAS VEGAS

 

 Reconnected with an RI friend who lives in Vegas now!

 

 

 Back to California

 

Melrose Ave

 

Runyon Canyon

Redondo Beach, Venice & Santa Monica

 Those two on the left I met last July in Alaska, they made such an impact on me and we kept in touch, so great seeing them again

The guy on the right, met him in Miami when I was 19 years old.. 12 years later we are still good friends!

 

Back at the end of January, for my 31st Birthday, I took the trip I have been wanting to take since I was little. The west coast was amazing for my birthday trip. Spending time with old friends and meeting new ones, exploring all the greatness of California and Vegas was just amazing and I cannot thank everyone enough for showing me the best of times and I cannot wait to go back and see so much more!